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Medicines
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(I'm home sick today with sinusitis.)

I'm sick in more ways than one. Every day, I take 2 1/2 pills for mental illness and am supposed to take 2 more for sinus infections. Before 2 months ago, I must have been taking somewhere between 4-5 pills because one was a Brand name drug since it wasn't on the market yet for generic. Having it become generic was the best day of my life (it seemed) since the price went down and I no longer had to gag because the size of the pill was ridiculous. I hate taking medicine. There was a point in my life when this was all okay, maybe because at age 22 it was the starting point and felt like a new birth, but now it just feels like bad karma each time having to start over with medicines and the people in my life who prescribe them to me. It gets cyclically worse with each new person. The current one I can't stand, even though he's supposed to be one of the state's best doctors. When I had a job where I wasn't receiving benefits, all I could do was try hard to hold off from going off the deep end because I didn't have sick pay, Rx insurance, etc. Waiting a three-month gap to begin receiving benefits was a frightening period, and I couldn't wait to see someone and be prescribed, even though it becomes something that you no longer want anything to do with once it's an everyday affair that seems too timeless. It's being stuck between a rock and a hypocritical hard place.

If there's one thing I wish I could know more about, it's the drug industry. While the movie "The Constant Gardener" may or may not be a good representation of the back stories of prescribed medication, I'm already feeling pretty sick with all the adverts around us. Newsweek story about drug product placement on televised programs like House, Scrubz, and Grey's Anatomy (http://www.newsweek.com/id/158746/output/print) and the only thing I want to say is Thank God for generic mental-health medicine the same way that I thank God for Walgreens brand cough syrup. Yes, learning about this is a commitment I can make. But I've got a feeling that when it comes to this one, ignorance is bliss.

September 24, 2008 | 5:12 PM Comments  2 comments

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esraa esra
September 24, 2008 | 6:13 PM
Get well soon!
I have the same illness..I I was awful last week, I can understand u very wel..I took antibiotic for sinusitis, thanks to God I m fine :)
melissasnowden Melissa Leigh Snowden
September 25, 2008 | 12:36 PM

Thank you! It's horrible, so I hope you stay healthy as well :)
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